10 Life Lessons to Excel in Your 30s

1. Start Saving for Retirement Now, Not Later
2. Start Taking Care of Your Health Now, Not Later
3. Don’t Spend Time with People Who Don’t Treat You Well
4. Be Good to the People You Care About
5. You can’t have everything; Focus On Doing a Few Things Really Well
6. Don’t Be Afraid of Taking Risks, You Can Still Change
7. You Must Continue to Grow and Develop Yourself
8. Nobody (Still) Knows What They’re Doing, Get Used to It
9. Invest in Your Family; It’s Worth It
10. Be kind to yourself, respect yourself

Above is distilled from collective wisdom of 600+ people who already went thru their 30s. Read more at: http://markmanson.net/10-life-lessons-excel-30s

45 Life Lessons

Regina Brett (born May 31, 1956) is a columnist for The Plain Dealer, a daily newspaper serving Cleveland, Ohio. She was a Pulitzer Prize finalist for commentary in 2008 and 2009.

This is something we should all read at least once a week! Make sure you read to the end!

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.

It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolls over to 50 this week, so here's an update:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.


She later added 5 more lessons to the list:
http://www.cleveland.com/brett/blog/index.ssf/2006/05/regina_bretts_45_life_lessons.html

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don't ask, you don't get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Are you with the right Partner?

During a seminar, a woman asked, " How do I know if I am with the right person?"

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?". In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?". Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind replied the author.

Here's the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet" Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this): The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know

WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO! ?

In love, both have to be willing.. it takes two... one sided love is not love, it's desperation and you can't have a relationship based on that!

For better, for worse , for richer , for poorer , in sickness , in health , until death do us part. That's the commitment when the feelings deceive you.

A long lasting marriage is not just about Love. At different phases of marriage different things act as the glue. At times it would be love, while some other times passion, and when both are temporarily absent - commitment!

Note: Most of the above post was copied from a facebook share!

Life of Pi - The Journey of our Lives

 The movie Life of Pi is very metaphoric. It is very easy to draw parallels to our normal life. Here is an example:

Pi: is You!

Storm : Denotes youth. The storm is the pressure from society and various challenges we come across while growing up and discovering ourselves

Ship-wreck: Finally we succumbs to all the pressure and get married

Tiger: We suddenly finds ourselves in a narrow world, lost with a carnivorous Tiger (our mate), who can't be trusted. We risks our life and still protects it, but it leaves without gratitude when it doesn't need us any more!

Zebra & Orangutan - Zebra is our sibling and Orangutan, the mother

Hyena - The brother/sister in-law who comes into the family to shred the zebra into pieces, and in the process kills the Orangutan too

Hope you enjoyed ;-)

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

Haven't been blogging since a while, trying to get back to it.. Time is the issue, there is a lot to blog about! Probably will get over the starting trouble with another interesting forward! Interesting, though may be a bit too generalised.. enjoy!

Human Brain Analysis - Man vs. Woman

1. MULTI-TASKING

Women - Multiple process
Women's brain is designed to concentrate on multiple tasks at a time. Women can Watch TV and talk over phone and cook. 
Men - Single Process
Men's brain is designed to concentrate only on one work at a time. Men can not watch TV and talk over the phone at the same time. They prefer to stop the TV while talking. They can either watch TV or talk over the phone or cook.

2. LANGUAGE
Women can easily learn many languages. But can not find solutions to problems. Men can not easily learn languages, they can easily solve problems. That's why in average a 3 years old girl has three times higher vocabulary than a 3 yeard old boy.

3. ANALYTICAL SKILLS
Mens brain has a lot of space for handling the analytical process. They can analyze and find the solution for a process and design a map of a building easily. But If a complex map is viewed by women, they can not understand it. Women can not understand the details of a map easily, For them it is just a dump of lines on a paper.

4. DRIVING
While driving a car, mans analytical spaces are used in his brain. He can drive a car fast. If he sees an object at long distance, immediately his brain classifies the object (bus or van or car) direction and speed of the object and he drives accordingly. Where woman take a long time to recognize the object direction/ speed. Mans single process mind stops the audio in the car (if any), then concentrates only on driving.

5. LYING
When men lie to women face to face, they get caught easily. Womans super natural brain observes facial expression 70%, body language 20% and words coming from the mouth 10%. Mens brain does not have this. Women easily lie to men face to face. So guys, do not lie face to face.

6. PROBLEMS SOLVING
If a man have a lot of problems, his brain clearly classifies the problems and puts them in individual rooms in the brain and then finds the solution one by one. You can see many guys looking at the sky for a long time. If a woman has a lot of problems, her brain can not classify the problems. she wants some one to hear that. After telling everything to a person she goes happily to bed. She does not worry about the problems being solved or not.

7. WHAT THEY WANT
Men want status, success, solutions, big process, etc... But Women want relationship, friends, family, etc...

8. UNHAPPINESS
If women are unhappy with their relations, they can not concentrate on their work. If men are unhappy with their work, they can not concentrate on the relations.

9. SPEECH
Women use indirect language in speech. But Men use direct language.

10. HANDLING EMOTION
Women talk a lot without thinking. Men act a lot without thinking

The Man Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down...  too good, couldn't help sharing! Even though a bit sarcastic, it brings out the basic difference between male and female psychology... perhaps you can check out the book 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' for more info on this!

Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear 'the rules' from the female side! Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE! 

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.

1. You have enough clothes

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!


1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.....

Pass this to as many women as you can -  
to give them a bigger laugh…actually doesn’t matter if they don’t

'Amen' - Autobiography of an ex-nun (after 33 yrs)

Ex-nun's confessions set to rock Kerala (India) Church..

Already reeling under several controversies, the Kerala Catholic Church is facing fresh embarrassment from a tell-all autobiography written by a nun who recently quit the Order alleging harassment from superiors. Apart from the Abhaya murder in which a nun and priests are accused, the Kerala Church was recently in the news for a priest “adopting” a 26-year-old woman.

'Amen — an autobiography of a nun’, released last week, is written by Dr Sister Jesme, 52, who was the Principal of St Mary’s College, Thrissur, till last August when she quit the Congregation of Mother Carmelite (CMC). Jesme’s autobiography includes a poignant version by her of how the convent authorities tried to twice prove that she had mental problems and get her admitted into a rehab centre after she reportedly spoke out against the malpractices within the Order

“Thirty-three years cannot be penned down in 180 pages but there are points the I want to make about the capitation fee, the quarrels that happen within the church, about the homo-sexuality, the hetero-sexuality,”

The state women's commission now says it will take up Jesme's case very seriously. “We are studying the matter and will take it up seriously. I cannot tell you anything more on this issue,” says State Women Commission Chairperson, Justice Sree Devi. The explosive life story of a Kerala nun, 'Amen - Oru Kanyasthreeyude Atmakatha' (Amen Autobiography of a Nun), by Sister Jesmi, is selling briskly in the state with its publishers having ordered a third reprint of 2,000 copies within weeks of its release.

Not long ago, a study had claimed that 25% nuns were unhappy in convents. ''It's a very courageous work. It's not easy for a person who has lived 30 years in a convent to bring out the undesirable things that happened there, particularly matters like jealousy and backbiting between sisters in responsible position,'' said M V Pylee, first vice chancellor of Cochin University of Science and Technology.

Before anyone jump into any conclusions, let us just be realistic and look at the background. Catholic church is the world's largest Christian church, representing over half of all Christians and one-sixth of the world's population. The Church's highest earthly authority in matters of faith, morality and Church governance is the pope. The Church defines its mission as spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ, administering the sacraments and exercising charity.

It operates social programs and institutions throughout the world, including schools, universities, hospitals, missions and shelters, as well as organizations such as Catholic Relief Services, Caritas Internationalis and Catholic Charities that help the poor, families, the elderly and the sick. Church played a big role in setting up hospitals and educational institutions all over then young, poor and budding India, which had tremendous influence in it's growth and progress.

Through apostolic succession, the Church believes itself to be the continuation of the Christian community founded by Jesus in his consecration of Saint Peter, a view shared by many historians. It has defined its doctrines through various ecumenical councils, following the example set by the first Apostles in the Council of Jerusalem. On the basis of promises made by Jesus to his apostles, described in the Gospels, the Church believes that it is guided by the Holy Spirit and so protected from falling into doctrinal error. Catholic beliefs are based on the Bible and on traditions handed down from the time of the Apostles, which are interpreted by a teaching authority. Those beliefs are summarized in the Nicene Creed and formally detailed in the Catechism of the Catholic Church.

With a history spanning almost two thousand years, the Church is one of the world's oldest institutions.

Although the Church maintains that it is the "one, holy, catholic and apostolic Church" founded by Jesus Christ, where one can find the fullness of the means of salvation, it acknowledges that the Holy Spirit can make use of other Christian communities to bring people to salvation. It believes that it is called by the Holy Spirit to work for unity among all Christians, a movement known as ecumenism. Modern challenges facing the Church include the rise of secularism and opposition to its pro-life stance on abortion and euthanasia.

Apart from above, the Church has been victim of many allegations, some proven to be right. Church also has many threats from new age Christians and communists/atheists. So the point is, don't use these odd and rare instances to generalize one of the oldest, biggest and yet surviving organization. It doesn't mean every priest or nun who is walking around in a clerical clothing is a pedophile, homosexual or some other kind of pervert. Catholic priests or nuns take the vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience. They also profess to obey certain guidelines for living and leave every earthly attachments and possessions behind, to serve the community and Jesus, spreading the message of love and melts off like a candle providing light and warmth to everyone around them.

But the devil is there everywhere, and we are all error-prone humans... no one is perfect. Even in the middle of the Eden garden with everything possibly around, in a perfect world, Satan was quite successful to convince Eve to sin :-)

So respect those who deserve it.. and respect them for what they are, not where they are!

Further reading:

http://www.indianexpress.com/news/exnuns-confessions-set-to-rock-kerala-churc.../425407/
http://ibnlive.in.com/news/kerala-nun-alleges-sexual-harassment-in-convents/85844-3.html
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/Cities/Thirupuram/Nun-recalls-sexual-abuse-horror/articleshow/4158330.cms
http://www.indianexpress.com/news/society-has-right-to-know-whats-happening-to-nuns/426132/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_Catholic_Church

http://www.nationmaster.com/encyclopedia/Catholic-order

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consecrated_life_(Catholic_Church)